Thursday, December 3, 2009

Not Yet!

I am still dealing with my miscarriage and I am so frustrated with my doctor. I have found the whole process extremely stressful and my emotions have been all over the place. Two days ago I started spotting again and that freaked me out but I had my ultrasound scheduled and I did my best not to worry. Yesterday I went for my ultrasound, got lost and missed the appt. I freaked out...not in an angry way but I barely made it back to the car before I started crying. I feel like I will be doing really well and then something happens and I feel like I can't cope and my world is crashing down. I feel like I am the worst mother and wife every and that I have lost myself. I call my doctor or rather the receptionist and explain what is going on and that I am stressed out and all I get back is a message saying that the doctor is not worried. I need some information that is accurate and reliable and google just freaks me out. At my mom's prompting I have called another doctor in town and I will meet with her tomorrow to see if she will be a more attentive doctor. We are a healthy family and rarely seek medical attention but when we do it is for something important.

So #3 is out of the loop for now until I can get a hold of my emotions and my miscarriage is officially over. I may wait until April now. Who I said I am all over the place.

I have found this site that is truly inspirational and has started to inspire me to love my body and to think about what I need to do to lose weight again. One positive about waiting to get pregnant is that I could lose more weight and be healthier. I highly reccomend going The Shape of A Mother and reading through it.

1 comment:

  1. I wish you the best of luck my dear! I have those crazy mom days too. I myself am done having kids.. I really don't think I could handle having another one and dealing with all the baby stuff all over again. I applaud you for all that you do. You are a great mom and wife :)and also a great friend. I hope you find a new doctor that is there to help you and not make you more stressed. Hope all goes well tomorrow :)