Georgia is 6 weeks today and that also means I have been a mother of three for that long too. I think overall it is going well and getting better each day. I can also say that I am enjoying it and most days when asked if I want another I don't laugh in their faces.
I am struggling with my parenting style. Because Ally and I had milk supply issues; breastfeeding and supply became my obsession. I nursed her for every little cry and she comfort nursed all the time. I also believed that keeping the baby at the breast was important. I did this for Zoe and it was okay. I am doing it for Georgia but it is getting hard.
Sleep is the root of the problem. It is not the length or how often she is up but it is extremely difficult to get her to go to sleep. It is a lot of nursing and that takes away from Ally and Zoe and they are showing signs that they need more attention. Georgia will nurse, fall asleep and then I wait for a bit and put her down and she wakes up like 10 minutes later if not sooner. This pattern continues until she is so overtired that nursing barely soothes her. She wants to suck but then gets mad that there is milk. The problem is that this takes all day or late into the night. Like today, she had a wonderful morning nap and got up at 12pm and she has not slept more than 20 minutes all day.
I know that she is young and this too shall pass but because nursing was the cure all for Ally and Zoe, I have no other tricks up my sleeve. I ask Mike for help but he has no clue either. I have tried the swing, I rock, walk, bounce and sing. These all work once or twice but never consistently and Georgia smells the milk so she gets even more mad. And then I am so tired that I give up to save my sanity.
I feel guilty for neglecting my other daughters, getting frustrated at Mike and Georgia.
I wish that I had a better memory to remember when a schedule and naps became easier. With Ally, I got her into a schedule pretty quickly because I slept with her for every nap. With Zoe, I was able to put her down by herself for the morning nap and I slept with her for the afternoon nap. From there I was able to easily transition them to sleeping by themselves and having a nice consistent schedule. Now with Georgia, the morning nap has just started to happen but the afternoon nap or naps do not happen.
I am writing this post to vent as that is the case with most of my posts and maybe if there is a 4th child to give me a better timeline as to when things will get better. I am also hoping that some of you followers and my wonderful commentors will help me with some tricks or just remind me that it will be better soon.
Hey Melynda,
ReplyDeleteSorry it's so hard! If she wants to suck but she's getting mad about the milk maybe you could try a soother? I didn't want to use one with J, but we did and it was a life saver. She weaned herself off of it months before I thought I would, so that was a plus to...but sometimes they just want to suck. When she discovered her fingers and then we gave her the soother, her sleeping got so much better.
Oh my Melynda Georgia sounds exactly like Brianne at that age... exactly!! As a past La Leche League leader I do know that 6 weeks is one of the growth spurts.. and that yes this too shall pass... but sleep deprevation is horrible on an adult.. makes us kids ourselves.
ReplyDeleteAs for Brianne... she is in University now... doesn't nurse anymore :-)
It flies by... just wait 4 months will be here in a blink and you will melt when she looks up at you and smiles her milky smile while nursing (my favorite memory)
Yeah, I'd actually fuess her fussiness and refusing to nap could be a symptom of a growth spurt, as well. We were struggling with that over the weekend - frequent, short nursing sessions punctuating a million small naps that didn't last more than 20 minutes a piece before he'd get mad and wake up again. It lasted a few days and seem to have blown over, mostly.
ReplyDeleteI understand your supply fears, I had major issues with Callie and it is a hot button issue for me, as well. That said, I do NOT seem to be having that problem with Seth, and the pacifier is a good tool for us. If I know he is hungry and dry I pop it in and hold it there until he takes it. I will usually put that back in during a nap three or four times in a row before I decide he may be genuinely hungry and not just wanting to comfort suck during his nap,
As for naps, we're flex schedulers here. He goes down for two solid naps a day and I am more flexible on the other cat naps. But the big family nap (at 4 pm) and bedtime (between 8:30 and 9:00) aren't negotiable, he is nursed, laid down drowsy, and left to fall asleep for both of those. If he starts fussing I go in and pat his head or put his pacifier in until he calms down, then I leave him to sleep again. Most times it only takes maybe two or these little episodes before he goes down for a 2-3 hour nap, at least.
During the day, I also wear him on my back for his little nap before the big afternoon one. That way I can do chores and tend to the girls, and he gets to doze off with lots of noise and activity, which keeps ohm from sleeping as deeply (and helps make him tired enough for the longer stretch). It also helps him sleep through more ruckus, which generally improves the quality of his sleep.
I don't know if any of this would help you, but in this house I usually just white knuckle it through the first six to eight weeks because that is when we get the bulk of our trouble and fussing. My kids fussed progressively more to that point, then they woke up one morning and it had magically tapered off. It just seems to be related to growth and maturity, and the little babies tend to get wore before they get better (easy first week or two, rough middle four, better again after that).
Thanks so much for the comments! I have tried a soother and I am actually giving it a more concerted effort than I ever had with the other two. Georgia hates it! I am going to try one other kind of soother before I give up.
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