Another Appointment

Today I had another midwive appointment.  It went really well and Jane talked to Ally about cutting the cord.  I hadn't even thought about who would cut the cord but I think it would be a neat memory.  Mike didn't want to cut the cord with Zoe so he can't imagine Ally wanting to.  He is kind of grossed out by it.  I am just excited by the possibility that Ally will get to see her sibling being born.

I saw some newborn pictures today and I got all teary because I am so ready to meet my baby!  Soon....

I had low blood pressure again and I think it is worse in the evenings because I tend to feel like crap.  Mike has been so helpful with cooking dinner and helping with the girls. 

I have also started to think about weight loss and exercise again.  My mom thinks I am nuts because I really should take some time to recover and get breastfeeding established.  I agree with her but I worry about my self-esteem afterwards.  I am going to do my best to not do anything except eat healthy until January.  I have always like New Year's resolution regardless if I stick to them or not.  So I think that will be a great time to go hard core again. 

My self-esteem took a big hit last year with the miscarriage and some issues Mike and I were having.  Being pregnant helps because a nice big round belly clearly shows that your body is doing something amazing.  But afterwards....well...I need to work on it.  I think good self-esteem is very important for succeding with a diet and is even more important for my kids.  So wish me luck!

Waiting Sucks!

I am trying really hard to not get anxious about when the baby is coming.  I know it is best for the babe to arrive on its own time but I want it to come now!  Tuesday night I had regular braxton hicks contractions which is similar to how I went into labour with Ally.  Tuesday and Wednesday would have been the absolute worse times for the baby to come.  Because my whole plan for birth would have had to change.  So since then I have been thinking a lot about the baby coming and I want it now. 

I think what I hate the most about the last couple of weeks is life is in a holding pattern.  I feel unable to make plans and discussing the future holds no interest for me.  I am enjoying this time with Ally and Zoe but the weather has been terrible and we are house bound, which is making me even more cranky.  Mike is working really hard and rationally I appreciate that but I just want a break and to be pampered.  I am also quite emotional.

I am doing my best to know that it is still early.  I will be 38 weeks on Saturday so there is lots of time and the longer I wait the better...I need to refocus and keep thinking Thanksgiving.  Even though I really want a September baby and not because I want the baby to be early (I do) but it satisfies my need and love for patterns.  Ally was born in March, Zoe in December and I wanted this babe to be born in September and if I have a 4th it will have to be born in June. I know, I know, lame right?

And the other thing is that I realized that I have been pregnant now for a year.  I probably conceived this time last year for the baby that I miscarried.  I guess I am just ready to have a little one in my arms.

So In Love

I am really in love with my girls right now.  Everything is so perfect.  They are just so cute, smart, funny and mine!  Now that we have conquered the sleep battle with Ally, life is just heaven.  No more fighting for hours and middle of the night wake ups and more fights.  Good sleep for everyone has made a huge difference on my outlook at life.  I am so glad that I can enjoy this last month of pregnancy with them.

Ally starts preschool tomorrow and we have been excitedly waiting for it since February.  Preschool helped with potty training and a little bit with the sleep battle.  I think Ally is going to love it and make many friends.  I am also a little scared because with making friends there is also heartbreak.  I wish I could shelter Ally from it all but I know it will make her stronger.  I just hope that we can talk about it and that I can be there for her. 

Tonight was also another big night for us.  Each day/night Ally gets a chance of decorating 4 links for a paper chain that is outlining her door.  Today it was finished so we went to Wal-Mart and she got to pick out her own toy.  She chose a princess, prince and horse.  She just loves the toy.  It was a lot of fun getting it with her tonight.  She was just over joyed with picking out her own toy.

Another Appointment

Yesterday I started my weekly appointments.  I thought I was so clever in scheduling my midwife and chiropractic appointments on the same day.  I am not so sure but it is too late now.  My plan was to head into the city for my midwife appointment in the morning, go to a friend's house for a playdate/lunch and then head to my chiro.  Well by the time we got home at around 3:30pm, no one had napped and everyone was done.  Zoe is in love with Ally and wants to play with her and sit right beside her but only on her terms.  She is a screecher and will screech at the drop of hat.  So that was our late afternoon, me trying to not scream more than Zoe.  I really can't stand her scream!  I have learned that I need to really watch the girls because my automatic response is to get Ally in trouble but lately it has been Zoe over-reacting.

My midwife appointment went really well.  My weight and blood pressure are good.  Baby is measuring just a week ahead and has a great heartbeat.  I talked to my midwife about when I need to go to the birth center.  They don't want me there until I am in active labour.  I was in active labour with Zoe for 3 hrs but I started counting later pretty much 12 hours before that.  So it will be interesting to see when this baby decides to arrive because it will all depend on when I head to the city and where I labour.  I am trying not to think about it because there is so much out of my control and I don't need any stress. 

I originally thought that I would go into the city as soon as I could to avoid the drive too late in labour but that may not make sense.  I could labour at a friend's house, mall or hotel but then again it depends on when I go into labour.  So I am just trying to be positive about the hour drive into the city and depending on the time will think positively about labouring at home and in the car.

I have started packing my bags.  The baby's is done and mine is mostly done.  I will probably pack the girls and Mike later on or in labour.